Habits - Friend or Foe?

As I read a devotional piece this afternoon, I was introduced to a quote by the theologian Augustine. The quote jumped off the page and pierced my stubborn will.

Augustine wrote,

"I was bound by the iron chain of my own will. I was rather an unwilling sufferer than a willing actor. And yet it was through me that habit had become an armed enemy against me, because I had willingly come to be what I unwillingly found myself to be."

In a day when personal responsibility is lacking, this quote reminds us of an undeniable truth, i.e., you are the sum total of your habits. Habits either elevate you to the next level of achievement or they shackle you to your not so productive past. They prod you to continue on despite the obstacles, or they allow you to make excuses for failing to excel.

Have your habits become an "armed enemy" against you? Are you willingly becoming what you unwillingly find yourself to be? Are your habits an "iron chain" binding you to an attitude that obviates change and progress?

Augustine did not allow the iron chain of this armed enemy to keep him from his high calling. As a theologian he went on to record a marvelous compendium of religious writings that have served the church since the fourth and fifth centuries. Augustine found freedom in Jesus Christ and the principles he declared. As a result his habits became his best friends instead of his enemies. The chain of bondage was released and he was free to willingly become what Christ had chosen him to be.

What habits are helping or defeating you? Are you willing to change those habits into productive friends that enable rather than disable advancement? Your lack of progress and change cannot be blamed on others if your habits are not designed to implement such.

Seek those habits that will help you get to where you want to be. Make them a part of every day. Don't compromise their fulfillment for any reason.

Stay tuned for some additional thoughts and suggestions for difference making habits.

Always make a difference!

Others

I awoke early this morning and decided to get on the computer to review bank accounts and peruse the web (that's the same as "surfing the web" for you byte heads), and visit some websites from some memorable experiences and relationships. In the process, I visited the website of friends who recently went through a very harrowing experience and rediscovered the importance of family and friends.

To put some context to this blog, I was raised as an only child. As a result, I considered everyone to be at my "beck and call." (Should you wish to verify the use of this phrase, check it out at the Word Detective.) Such an attitude creates angst both for the "attituder" and the "attitudee." Knowing this, I have made measurable strides as an adult extending myself to others and learning to follow the Apostle Paul's admonition to the Philippians, "do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others" (Philippians 2:4, NASB). Yet the struggle remains!

Reading a blog entry this morning reminded me of the importance of self-sacrifice and love in relationships. Here's a sample:

"We decided a while back that the best scenario would be a home environment and as Bill and Janet’s home is not wheelchair accessible we extended an invitation to them to come and stay with us until other arrangements could be made. Janet is staying in our guest room upstairs and Bill is staying in our office which is now a bedroom for him and it has a full bath attached which is convenient. It seems to us that the Lord, once again, provided this home for us for more reasons than we knew at the time."

How many of us would sacrifice our new home, and all its amenities, for the benefit of someone else? In a day of selfish ambition, it is refreshing to find some who still practice the Golden Rule. These folks are the real DifferenceMakers in our society.

Perhaps you know of others who are making a difference at "street level." Share them so DifferenceMakers can publish their contribution.

Happy 4th of July, and spend some time remembering the DifferenceMakers who made this great nation possible.

Always make a difference!

The Pressure's On!

Today was a very busy day! Three day weekends are always great . . . until Tuesday! This past weekend was no exception. A Difference Maker, however, always looks for the lesson or lessons in the hardships. Two such lessons were found in today's turmoil.

First, leaders always emerge when the pressure is on.

For any manager, scheduling is an issue. No matter how you plan, it seems that the exception seems to become the rule. Short staffing creates a tremendous amount of pressure on any team. Leaders, however, see opportunities to improve a negative circumstance.

Today was no exception. A team member noticed a coverage need, and volunteered to fill that need. Though this should seem like a common sense action, in today's egocentric world very few will jump at the opportunity to vary their schedule for the benefit of the team. Such team members deserve to be publicly complimented and offered further leadership development opportunities.

Second, pressure provides an opportunity for your best to be revealed.

Pressure is revelatory. It always provides a glimpse of what is inside a person. Consider your actions during the most recent pressure packed event. What did it reveal about you? What characteristics were evident to those around you?

A Difference Maker will learn to let the pressure bring out his or her best. I am reminded of the words of Paul the Apostle writing to the Roman church, "We continue to shout our praise even when we are hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we're never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary - we can't round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!" (Romans 5:3-5, The Message)

When negative circumstances are seen through the eyes of opportunity, one will allow the pressure to develop positive characteristics that enhance the lives of others and improve the conditions in which they operate.

The pressure's on! What will be your response?

Always make a difference!

Courage vs. Fear

My wife and I just returned from a trip to the Christiansburg, VA area. Since Blacksburg, VA is just a few miles from Christiansburg, we decided to visit Virginia Tech and pay our respects to the 32 innocents that lost their lives at the hands of a deranged young man.

Our visit to the temporary memorial, set up to honor the victims in front of Burrus Hall, was very moving. In spite of the number of people around the memorial, the mood was quiet and respectful; a fitting tribute to those given no respect by their assailant.

Especially moving was the small memorial to Professor Liviu Librescu. As I reflected on the selflessness of this courageous man, I was reminded that courage is not the absence of fear, but the realization that something is more important than the fear.

Professor Librescu was a teacher in the truest sense of the word. His respect for the life of his students cost him his own. Such a lesson must not be lost on our culture.

Rick Warren, in his bestselling A Purpose Driven Life pointedly reminds us that our existence is not about us. Dr. Librescu embodied this axiom. He was indeed a DifferenceMaker. Sadly he lost his life doing so, but let us not lose his lesson.

We honor those who lost their lives at the Virginia Tech on April 16, 2007. May we never forget the lessons this horrific event provides.

A Rosie By Any Other Name . . .

How one can be excused for using public profanity, in a speech nonetheless, and escape being vilified is beyond this author's comprehension. There was a time when one's speech was guarded by decency in consideration of others. Even those who weren't raised in an upscale, "proper" household knew the boundaries of decency. It seems those boundaries are now as porous as our border with Mexico.

One's right to use profanity is not in question. As abhorrent as it may seem, this author is willing to die for any ones right to freedom of speech. That, however, is not the issue. With freedom comes responsibility. Freedom, in other words, has limits. And, in a free nation, those limits must be self imposed.

Perhaps Soren Kierkegaard had it right when he said, "People demand freedom of speech as a compensation for freedom of thought which they seldom use." Common sense would dictate that you think before your speak. Isn't that what grandma always told you? A preacher's wife once corrected this author by saying, "You need to weigh your words!" And, for the record, she was right.

Rosie O'Donnell has been the recipient of much justified critcism. Whether she is funny or not will not excuse her crassness and vulgarity. She represents what might be termed a new cultural order in which anything goes without regard to its offensiveness, rudeness or truthfulness.

For me, a Rosie by any other name would still smell bad.

How about you?

Always make a difference.

There is Hope!

How can one make a difference in this world?

What are the core truths around which a culture can huddle in times of chaos?

Where can one go when they are disillusioned at best, and despondent at worst, with the seeming inconsistencies in a "politically correct" world?

These are only a couple of questions that come to this authors mind when I review the events of the past few days. No matter how you cut it, the massacre in Blacksburg, VA reveals a terrible void in our cultural matrix. I submit that the gaping hole in our social fabric begins and ends with the philosophy of relativism.

There can be no doubt that the pathetic actions of a deluded young man were wholly his responsibility. Regardless of the cultural influences, one must be accountable for the choices that he or she makes.

Relativism, birthed by Secular Humanism, is a philosophy that effectively removes the ability to place blame for any action. As such, to declare that something is either good or evil becomes impossible. The argument of a relativist would be, "What is evil to you may be good for someone else." This circular reasoning condemns a culture to anarchy.

One must begin to face the fact that this world has some basic truths that are inviolable. We must define what is good and what is evil. To do so requires that a society envelope themselves in a system that does not vary with whim or caprice; a system that is founded on inalienable rights endowed by a Creator. Such began this grand experiment called America.

DifferenceMakers invites you to a conversation around this topic. There must be a groundswell of common sense citizens to rise up and say, "Enough is enough." If you have an interest in this discussion, please leave comment. Let it be known, that not all comments are created equal. One must express their opinion clearly, cleanly and concisely. All profane or derogatory comments will be immediately expunged from the record. Reason must prevail if we are to have a productive dialog.

Let's make a difference in this rapidly declining culture.

The Box Full of Love

Here's a story that I "borrowed" from Jim Gentil and his Positive People Power Newsletter. For more information check out his website by clicking on his name above. Enjoy the story . . .

The Box Full of Love

An 11-year-old boy named Todd was struggling to adjust to the death of his mother. His father had abandoned the family long ago, and Todd was living with an aunt who made it known she resented the responsibility.

On several occasions, the boy's teacher heard the aunt tell Todd, "If it weren't for my generosity, you would be a homeless orphan." The teacher tried hard to make Todd feel valued, and she encouraged his interest in making things.

Just before the Christmas break, Todd shyly presented her with a small decorated box." It's beautiful!" the teacher gushed. Todd replied, "There's something special inside my mom gave to me before she died. She said it's the one thing I can give and still have plenty left. It helps you feel better when you're sad and safe when you're scared."

As the teacher started to open the box, Todd warned her, "Oh, you can't see it."

"Well, what is it?" she asked kindly.

"It's love. And you're the first person, since my mom, who I love."

The teacher hugged Todd and whispered in his ear, "I'll treasure this forever. It's the best gift I ever got." She kept the box on her desk always. Whenever she was sad or scared, she opened it and the love inside never let her down.

Years later, Todd sent her the tassel he wore for his graduation from medical school. It's been in the box ever since.

In truth, the gift that keeps on giving is not diamonds; it's love. The more you give away, the more you have left.

Make a difference in someone's life today by sharing some love.

Happy Valentine's Day!

The Prophets of Can't

How many struggling individuals have surrendered their dreams to the Prophets of Can't. Sad is the state of the person who allows their hopes, dreams or aspirations to fall prey to the "poor spirits" spoken of by Teddy Roosevelt, "Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorius triumphs, even though checkered by failure... than to rank with those poor spirits (emphasis mine) who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat."

Edgar Guest composed the following poem. I hope it gives you a proverbial shot in the arm, and helps to energize you when the going gets tough.

CAN'T

Can't is the worst word that's written or spoken;

Doing more harm here than slander and lies;

On it is many a strong spirit broken,

And with it many a good purpose dies.

It springs from the lips of the thoughtless each morning

And robs us of courage we need through the day:

It rings in our ears like a timely sent warning

And laughs when we falter and fall by the way.

Can't is the father of feeble endeavor,

The parent of terror and halfhearted work;

It weakens the efforts of artisans clever,

And makes of the toiler an indolent shirk.

It poisons the soul of the man with a vision,

It stifles in infancy many a plan;

It greets honest toiling with open derision

And mocks at the hopes and the dreams of a man.

Can't is a word none should speak without blushing;

To utter it should be a symbol of shame;

Ambition and courage it daily is crushing;

It blights a man's purpose and shortens his aim.

Despise it with all of your hatred of error;

Refuse it the lodgment it seeks in your brain;

Arm against it as a creature of terror,

And all that you dream of you someday shall gain.

Can't is the word that is far from ambition,

An enemy ambushed to shatter your will;

Its prey is forever the man with a mission

And bows but to courage and patience and skill.

Hate it, with hatred that's deep and undying,

For once it is welcomed 'twill break any man;

Whatever the goal you are seeking, keep trying

and answer this demon by saying: "I can!"

Making a Difference . . . because I CAN!